today…but before…

One year ago today I was in the doctors office, looking at our little miss via ultrasound, she was perfect, I was huge!  I was struggling with my sugars and with my blood pressure, but she was perfect!YATESKATHLEEN20120405142228519One year ago today the boys were playing with Aunt Juanita and dying eggs!  And being adorable!  They were very excited to meet baby sister!!

IMG_4180I then was on a mad rush!  Get someone to watch boys, pack bags for Eric and I, get dinner going, make sure all the beds were made with clean sheets…find someone to watch the animals, make sure Eric is on his way home, get the babies stuff together, clean the dishes…and then….IMG_4201



Meet Miss Anna Muriel!!  When it was time to push at 11:50pm I asked the doctor if we could lie about the time, I so wanted her to be born on 4-6-12!  The doctor laughed, there was no chance of a lie!  But Anna knew it was time, she was ready to bust outta there!  And poof I reached down and pulled Miss Anna into the world at 11:56pm on 4-6-12!!

©Keri Meyers Photography, LLC_0200_2


Miss Anna was and is a game changer.  She has changed EVERYTHING!  My kids all teach me things everyday, but Anna has taught me that I know nothing!  And not in a bad way, but in a “hey lady you have no idea” kinda way!  She makes us all smile a million times a day!  She was a tough cookie for the first 9 months, she knew what she wanted and wasn’t going to stand for any less!  And ya know what! That makes me so happy!!!  I hope that as she grows up she never forgets who she is!  I hope for her so very much!  But really, mostly, I just hope for happiness!!  As she has grown this year I have seen her begin to become Anna, and I am so excited to keep getting to know this little lady!!  Such a blessing these children are!  So much joy!  So much work!  So much love!  I might just burst! photo (28)

And as much as I don’t like that a whole year has passed…I am unbelievably excited to see who these little amazing people become over the next year!  Happy birthday tomorrow Miss Anna Muriel!  Happy birthday!

Remember when…

IMG_3082 It has been just over a year since Henry was in the hospital.  And thankfully a year since he last had any issues with his JIA!!!  He hasn’t had any more inflamed joints!  And although that doesn’t mean he is fully in the clear yet, it does show us that he most likely will not be having many “outbreaks”!!

The time leading up to his hospital stay and the time following it changed me so very much.  It changed the type of parent I am, it changed my view of medicine, it changed how I look at the everyday!  But more than anything it showed me who Henry is.  Those long weeks of him being uncomfortable, of us not knowing what was wrong, weeks of Henry not using his leg at all, of long days in the ER and long days in Doctors offices!  The days of being poked and prodded day and night, of tests and surgery and more tests!  Those days Henry and I learned so much about each other.  I learned about Henry’s character, his disposition, the kind of person he will some day be!

This picture pretty much sums him up to me.  It may not be the happiest of memories, but holy hanna…look at this monkey!  He is a content child, the most content I know.  He is adaptive!  I believe with everything in me that if they hand’t figured out what was going on that Henry would have adjusted to using one leg without complaint!  He is loving and snuggly, and boy!  He is all that being a boy entails!  This little man is not a complainer, he isn’t a fusser, he is strong, and brave and everything that I want to be when I grow up.

Thank you Henry, for reminding me EVERY DAY to live with joy, and passion, and love.  And complete craziness too, of course!


I read a blog today that encouraged people to blog, to write their thoughts and recount their day.  The idea being that someday your children will be thankful that you documented their childhood.  What this blog didn’t say was sometimes the days are short, sometimes you need to sacrifice need vs want, some days you will not want to write nor should you, some days your kids need you to be very present…all this blog said was that you should blog…for your children.

Now, lets be honest, this lady surely wasn’t trying to guilt me into blogging, she wasn’t purposefully trying to make me feel bad for not documenting my child’s life.  And really, I don’t think I feel that way, I do feel like in our life, in the way that I have been living the last year of my life…that blogging is maybe not for us.  That maybe my connection to social media isn’t working.

I am thankful for the memories that I have here in this place, that I can look back and see where we were.  But the cost of all of it seems a bit high for me right now.  I think that blogging and Facebook are a passive way of having relationships.  I think that I want my kids to see me talking to humans!  To making phone calls and writing letters.  That I want them to see that you have to actually contact someone to know how they are doing, what their thoughts are, how their day was.

We have been busy, and I have been socially absent.  I have pulled away from my friends and only kept the relationships that are easy and effortless, but I didn’t realize it because I still knew what so and so was doing because they updated FB that they were at the grocery store and that made me feel like I didn’t need to call.  And I don’t want my kids to think that this is how a relationship works.

Not to say that in a week I will log back on or start bloggin like a mad woman, but for now…I need some real connection.  I need my kids to get a real connection!!

june 6th

It has been quite a while since I last came to this place.  Honestly, I just don’t have the time…who would have thunk!  My priorities are different, my goals for my day are different.

If I am being honest, we have been in survival mode.  It isn’t about getting things done as much as keeping our heads above water!  But we have turned a corner, oh what a beautiful corner we have turned!!  Our new normal is glorious!!  It is happier, and more structured, it give each of us some time to shine!  Miss Anna has found the amazingly wonderfully stupendous goodness called sleep!!  I am not a baby scheduler.  My boys found their schedule on their own, and they both were great sleepers.  I am a feed on demand, sleep on demand, wake on demand kinda mom.  But!!!  Anna made me question my ways.  Maybe, just maybe, she needed structure.  Maybe she just wasn’t going to be a good sleeper.  Maybe she would fuss till she turned 18 and moved into her own place (you better believe if you are going to fuss till you are 18 you are getting kicked out!).  Maybe, just maybe, I needed to let her fuss it out.  Well, I think she was listening and realized that she needed to buck up!  Because just when I thought I was surely going to die of sleep deprivation…she realized the goodness she was missing!  We are now a 8pm to 6 or 7am family!!!  She naps like a champ twice a day too!!!  And who knew, I just may not need a valium a day…sleep might just be enough!!


Sleep isn’t all that happened around here over the last few months!  Cole turned FOUR!  We went on vacation! TWICE! and Anna turned Five months!  Oh, and we lost Henry at the blueberry patch!  It has been a crazy last few months!!  And holy hanna can you believe fall starts in just a few days!?!  Wow!!

on June 6th…

On June 6th my little Miss Anna will be TWO months old!  two months!  Geezo.

Since the last time I posted…

Henry got cuter! and I didn’t even know that was possible!!!

Anna got bigger!

Cole has mastered the art of the big brother!

She started having tummy time…

And liking it!
Little Miss is making eye contact like a normal human.  And a coo here and there, each one making me a little teary, they are just too sweet for words.

I have lost myself in her…I might need an intervention!  Her cheeks!  Her lips!  Her hair!!!  I am in love, deeply, whole heartedly IN LOVE!

We realized that she was actually looking at things…oh and she can roll over too

Overall, we have been just living our normal life.  Our normal life is awesome.  It is nothing special, nothing to write home about…it is completely perfect!  It is chaos, as usual.  Our normal life is very very loud!  Anna is working on her squeak of a cry, I think that she is realizing that if she is too quiet she will not be heard.  The boys still ask for her first thing in the morning and make sure to give her lots of kisses and tell her that she is “sooo cute!”.  Henry has been helping me feed her, and Cole is pretty much taken over all of the big brother duties.

I am thankful EVERY SINGLE DAY that I am not! pregnant! any! more!!!  No matter how much sleep I do not get, or how many hours a day I hold a crying baby, no matter how much poop I deal with or how much laundry I wash…nothing! could make me wish I was pregnant again🙂  YIPPEE!!!  I love my body when there isn’t a baby growing in it!!  I am thankful that this little body can carry a child to term, a healthy child, but boy oh boy I am not a fan of the journey.

In May I turned a year older.  We ate far too many baked goods, and celebrated another year of being lucky enough to be a mom!  I even got a new lens for my camera…which is full of pictures of the little Miss.

It has been a good two months!  I am grateful in so many ways!  I have no complants (or very few at least)! But please, please, please…can this year go a little slower.  Please.  I need to soak it all in.


baby girl

Three weeks!!!  Three weeks of our lives have gone!  That is amazing, and that is all it takes to forget how much pregnancy sucks!  It wasn’t all that bad!  She was more than worth whatever I was complaining about…wait, what was I complaining about?

We spend some of our time doing this!  But, don’t let that face fool you, she is still quiet and squeaky.  It is sad how much she is smiled at and told she is “so cute” or “very cute” while she is doing just this, she still has some work to do if she wants us to believe her.

But most of her time is spent sleeping, she likes to sleep.  The boys like that because then they can hold her, I like it because she is so darn cute and poke and squeeze when she is sleeping…and her sleep smiles just might kill me!!!

Someone told me that I would get over my fear of “girly”, that person was 1/4 of the way correct!  There are some of the boys clothes that I LOVE to see her in.  There are little frills and dresses that I LOVE!!  But, oh goodness, when I walk by the big girl clothes at the store I am still very close to full on panic attack.  Baby steps, I need baby steps🙂

This little man, oh goodness!!  He has become much much more of himself over the last three weeks!  He talks nonstop!  NO, seriously, I swear, this kid can talk.  And he is so darn polite!  When we go to the store he ALWAYS says thank you to anyone who helps us, and he says goodbye to everyone.  He is a booger, a handful, he cannot be trusted, I am not about to let him walk without a stroller any time soon.  He is strong willed and hilarious.  He makes us smile seconds after making us angry.  This one is trouble with a capital T!  But…I love the this but…I wouldn’t change anything!  HONESTLY, I promise, I wouldn’t change it for nothin🙂

Big brother, he was born a big brother, everything about him.  He is going to be 4 this summer but might as well be six!  He is so helpful, and loving, he was ment to be a big brother.  He is trying to completely skip his mid day nap/quiet time…and it is bad.  He isn’t ready, but he is ready to speak his mind.  The struggle is tough, and we often forget the importance of this little man getting his sleep…the result is him in full emotional breakdown.  Oh the joys of being a parent🙂

Life in our house is wonderful!  It is complete chaos (we knew that was coming)!  I did seven loads of laundry today and put it all away! Eric baked mini pies and home made cheese its!  He is currently teaching himself to use my sewing machine.  It isn’t a place I would invite people to, it is littered with our life!  But it is perfect, and we are all enjoying it.



Can you believe it has been one whole week!!  Can you???  Did your week disappear as quickly as mine??  I don’t know what it is with babies and their inability to take their time growing…but seriously! Knock it off already!Miss Anna has fairly smoothly made her home here!!  She has won over her brothers hearts and completely made mush of Eric and mine.  Henry is doing better than expected, although he is surely having a hard time finding his place, but he is smitten with her as much as the rest of us!  He hasn’t tried to kill her yet!  And that is a huge plus if you ask me🙂  He runs when she cries and says “my baby is crying!!”, and when he wakes up he says “where is my baby”  If I am not holding her it is the same question ” where is my baby” He is always wondering where HIS baby is!  It is about the cutest thing ever!!  Both the boys smother her with kisses and tickles and tell me how cute she is.  It isn’t easy, and our house is crazy right now, but it is amazingly beautiful to watch your kids love on their sibling!!

We have had some fantastic sunny days here!!  I am pretty sure that is why Anna came to meet us, she knew that the weather would be fantastic!  Cole and I seem to get to enjoy them the most as he and I don’t sleep as much as the littles.  But Anna has had her fair share, she has a bit of the jaundice so the vitamin D is highly recommended, so we listen.

She is growing, she is eating like a champ and she poops more than I remembering the boys ever pooping!!  They say in the first few weeks that you don’t see much poop, that regularity is not something to worry about…well HOME GIRL! she poops a ton!  Hahaha, at least we know she is getting enough of mamma’s milk🙂  And she is quiet, she is sweet, she is a cuddler, and she is beginning to spend way more time awake!  Did I mention that she poops…A LOT!

We are trying to keep busy, trying to make sure that the boys are getting good run around time!

Today we are going on a picnic, yesterday the zoo!  The boys got to run around at the kidz bounce this last week and we took Anna on her first walk to the coffee shop!!  She has been a dream thru all of it!